I’ve been listening to an audio book by Russell Brand called Recovery. It’s effing brilliant and not only that, quite hilarious (has lots of F bombs). I recently heard a quote from him; it struck me to the core.

“The opposite of addiction is connection.“

As a codependent, my addiction is more subtle than drugs or alcohol but no less destructive. My addiction is people; my addiction is a love addiction. I have a love deficit! I try to heal this deficit through love from people. Addiction merely numbs (or masks) the love deficit or whatever pain I’m currently dealing with on a minutely/hourly/daily/weekly basis.

I try to avoid the pain by looking to other people for my value, worth and lovableness. Just so you know, this leads to more pain, not less. Instead, I’m learning to find my value, worth and lovableness from the Lord and from within. By connecting with the Lord at times when I feel shaky or uncertain or in pain, I can address the issue head on in a healthy way instead of trying to numb the pain. By reminding myself that I am indeed valuable, worthy and lovable, I connect with myself in a way I never have before. This leads to greater connection with others because my freaking love deficit/addiction isn’t getting in the way of true love and intimacy.

I’m grateful for those who have gone before me in recovery to lead the way to healthy, loving relationships. The journey is NO JOKE but entirely worth it because I am worth it. SO ARE YOU!