Adventuring through the Middles Ages

Yes, I am adventuring through the Middle Ages. As Victor Hugo said, “Forty is the old age of my youth, fifty the youth of old age.” I can certainly tell that I am in the old age of my youth. How do I know? Let me count the ways. All the young whippersnappers who are reading along have my permission to go Snapchat something cool since this post will probably bore you to death. 

1. Reading glasses. Yes, I now need them. But they are never where I last put them. Have you tried cooking with reading glasses? Use them to read the recipe, take them off to cook. Look for glasses frantically while whatever is cooking is becoming a burnt offering to the Lord. It’s insane. 

Okay, even I am bored and depressed with this list. 

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Why do I say aging is an adventure? Do you know the risks and dangers of aging? Clearly, there is danger around every corner. A woman hot-flashing in 100-degree weather. Foreplay including stretching and two Advil. Bladder control. Someone daring to get on my last nerve. And who thought it was a good idea to have women go through menopause when their children are hormonal teens? One homicidal hormonal maniac in the house is enough! D-A-N-G-E-R-O-U-S! 

All joking aside, I definitely want to adventure into the sunset of my life full of vim and vigor/vinegar (which is it? In my case, probably both.) In reality, aging is inevitable. Diane Von Furstenberg says, “Aging is out of your control. How you handle it, though, is in your hands.” This is such a good challenge for me. I want to handle aging by laughing often, (teaspooning* in the process) cussing appropriately, and trying to enjoy each day as I battle high cholesterol and choke down humongous daily supplements. I’ve decided to arrive at Fifty feeling nifty. When I get there, I will be in the youth of my old age and believe me, I will kick some butt. I will have to stretch first, check my pantyliner and make sure I have my glasses but then, look out! 

Welcome to the world of reading glasses! 


I’ve been invited to blog along with some fantastic women who are also writing on the topic of Adventure. Would you take a moment and scroll through the blog roll? Click here to read Sarah’s adventure.




*euphemism for wetting one’s panties. 



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6 thoughts on “Adventuring through the Middles Ages

  1. You are so hysterical! “When I get there, I will be in the youth of my old age and believe me, I will kick some butt. I will have to stretch first, check my pantyliner and make sure I have my glasses but then, look out! ” haha! YES!

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